


good enough

by knhknhknh



Series: can i put on my clothes first? [10]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Insecurities, Sad, Self-Doubt, angst angst angst, poor mari :(
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-11
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-07-14 08:31:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7162502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knhknhknh/pseuds/knhknhknh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ladrien june, day ten: insecurities </p><p>“I’m sorry,” she whispers over his sleeping frame. “I’m sorry that I can’t be who you want me to be.”<br/>It’s almost as if Ladybug has already flung her yoyo and headed across the Paris rooftops, leaving a shaky Marinette behind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	good enough

**Author's Note:**

> THESE PROMPTS ARE SO SAD!!!!!!!  
> i let this one get happier than [how can you be jealous of yourself? (ao3)](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7143527) because i was TIRED of the SAD!!!  
> dont get me wrong tho. this fic is still sad.  
> i really wanted the insecurities not to be "marinette isnt good enough for adrien" so i tried to go the route of "ladybug/mari is scared of the pedestal she's on" but idk, i tried.  
> hope you enjoy!!!!

One of the best parts about Ladybug’s visits to Adrien is when he sleeps. His nose crinkles as he snores softly. Ladybug is positive that Adrien sleeping is the actual definition of adorable.

Not that she was being _creepy_ , but most times, he falls asleep in her lap before she can stop him. And when he does, she can’t help but let him lay in her lap. It gives her comfort. Ladybug sees him at peace, and it gives her time to think and reflect before she leaves her cuddly boyfriend.

But one of the worst parts about her visits is when he sleeps. Sometimes, she thinks too much. She thinks about whether Adrien’s happy. She thinks about hurting Chat Noir with her new relationship. And worst of all, she thinks about Adrien’s unwavering faith.

Marinette prides herself on many of her attributes. She considers herself talented and smart, and hell, she was even _Ladybug_ , Savior of Paris. But she didn’t think she could live up to Adrien’s idealization. He treats her as a goddess, like she is precious and should be worshiped.

While he made her feel special, she worries that she won’t be able to live up to the pedestal he places her on. Under all the spandex and luck, she’s Marinette. And Marinette couldn’t be on a pedestal.

She feared that one day, she would crack under the pressure of it. Marinette knows that there was no way she could really fit the hero mold Adrien had created in his head, and she wasn’t sure what she would do when he learns she’s nothing like that.

 _If you ever tell him,_ Tikki would say.

She runs her hand through Adrien’s honey-blonde hair, curling the strands around her fingers gently. He shifts under her touch, then rolls over and his eyebrows furrow together. Ladybug traces his cheekbones as an apology falls from her lips.

“I’m sorry,” she whispers over his sleeping frame. “I’m sorry that I can’t be who you want me to be.”

It’s almost as if Ladybug has already flung her yoyo and headed across the Paris rooftops, leaving a shaky Marinette behind.

“I’m sorry I’m not _enough_.” Ladybug chokes back a sob, shivering. Adrien moves again in her lap but she’s too distraught to notice.

Even though Marinette’s confidence isn’t low, Adrien’s praises sometimes remind her that she doesn’t reach the impossibly high bar he imagines she does.

“I’m _not_ perfect and I-I’m not immortal. I’m just--I’m just this normal girl under the mask.” And she’s happy about herself and her life until she’s painfully reminded that she will never live up to his expectations. One hand reaches up to her own face, rubbing her eye vigorously while the other still tangles itself in his hair. Ladybug sniffles above Adrien, telling him all the things she’s too terrified to tell him.

“I’m-I’m not some worshiped being, you know? I worry that you believe I’m magical and this--this _thing_ that can’t be achieved or something,” the words tumble out of her mouth. “What if--what if you never see me for me? I’m so, so _afraid_ that you won’t see my flaws until it’s too late and you’re trapped. I know--I know you think you love me but what if you don’t? What if I’m not good enough? _God,_ Adrien, what if I’m just _not good enough_?” Ladybug barely manages to continue before the tears leak out from her eyes. They stream down, coating her cheeks. She tries to wipe away the salty water, but a thumb reaches her face before her own does.

“Shh, don’t cry,” Adrien sits up and wipes both of her cheeks, cradling her face in his hands. She’s sobbing and dry heaving, but he pulls her into his chest anyway. Adrien pats her on the back soothingly, willing her not to cry.

He rests his chin in her hair and holds her steady as she trembles. Adrien learns that Ladybug cries almost silently, and he hates it.

“You are good enough, you know,” he says under his breath, and he wonders if she even catches it. “You’re great, better than everything I've always wanted.”

“But you don’t--you don’t _know_ that.” Her voice cracks and Adrien cracks with it. Here she is, doubting herself because of him, and he hates it. He hates it a lot, he learns.

“You’re right, you’re not perfect. You have real flaws but I still love you for all of them.” Little sniffles from Ladybug follow his words as he rubs her back. “Please, don’t think you aren’t enough.”

The room fills with the sound of Adrien tapping on her back, tracing patterns with his fingers and her crying comes to a standstill.

Adrien cups her face, tilting her chin up to look at her directly, but she squeezes her eyes shut.

“Hey, here, look at me,” he whispers. Ladybug’s red-rimmed eyes open slowly and it pains him to think that she’s hurting.

He presses his warm lips to her forehead as she takes in a shaky breath.

“I want you to know that I admire you a lot,” he begins as he brushes the loose hairs behind her ears, “but in no way do I worship you. You’re amazing, yeah, but I don’t want you to think I expect a lot from you. Because you’re going to make mistakes and you're going to change and it’s going to be okay.”

Ladybug clutches his black cotton tee, nodding. “It’s just hard.”

Adrien’s heart breaks. His Lady’s voice seems so small and scared. It makes him wonder about the girl under the mask and what he's put her through.  
“I’m sorry I made you feel this way.”

She shrugs, burying her face in his shirt again. “It happens. I’m a teenage girl.”

“But it’s not like you deserve it.” Adrien points out, trailing his fingers along her spine.

“No one does. It just happens.” Ladybug looks up at him, smiling despite her heavy words. “But it’ll be okay. I’m okay now that I know I don’t have to be _Ladybug_ with you. I can just be me.”

“You can always be you,” he kisses her forehead again. “And I’ll love you for it. Always.”

Adrien’s arms stay wrapped around her until she’s asleep in his arms. He knows she’ll be gone in the morning, but for now, he can pretend that she’ll be there. Always. In a sense, she will always be there. She always does come back, and every day they work out the hardships of their relationship together.

**Author's Note:**

> comment/give kudos/ect if you liked it!! thanks for reading!!! :) follow/bother/talk to me at [ladriened](http://ladriened.tumblr.com) on tumblr!


End file.
